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Middlemaze

by Erin Tobey

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1.
I'm Young 04:49
I’M YOUNG Every time I whistled in the wind to move the trees, never saw the, never felt the breeze Every time I covered up my eyes to set the sun, it would be done I’m young I could move a mountain stone by stone It may take all day but that’s a sacrifice I’d make Oh Mom, don’t call me God, Mom! Don’t call me I could open doors for you, don’t even need a key Trust me, babe, they’ll let me in for free I’m a firecracker but don’t come near me with a spark I like it dark I’m young... My love is a deep, abiding love It lives on the dance floor of the club My love spans the length and breadth of time It lives until it dies On reflection, I could see that I’m a product of my time, if I reflected
2.
MEDICINE GARDEN Let us in, Medicine Garden There is poison flowing through our veins Maybe we could lay down in the shadows of your boughs and let it drain Too many broken parts Too many teflon pans It’s hard to know where to start Might have to start over Seed the clouds and make it rain! Babe, I know it’s hard to change, but seed the clouds and make it rain Too many bees sip from frozen flowers then hide away below the storm Climb out into the future where it’s warm Too many withered hearts Too many empty hands It’s hard to know where to start Might have to start again Seed the clouds and make it rain... Fear is easy Everything else is hard Fear is easy Everything else is Love is hard
3.
Leaf Pile 03:38
LEAF PILE Leaf pile burning on the side of the road The carbon wanted to be free in the wind like it was on the tree Put us all to sleep Golden corn husk sleeping bags we’ll be tamales in the spring I can’t wait ‘til then Several local murders in keeping with the season where everything dies, everything dies, everything dies Only some are born again (Not the humans) The only time we sit around is every single day, staring at our own brains The mind reflects the eye, reflects the mind, reflects the eye in an infinite hall like the TV at the mall I am calling for the last time I’ll be resting my eyes
4.
ALL OVER THE WORLD All over the world, people are settling for and in places where they belong, and don’t belong Right and wrong Turn on your lights so we can both see You creep like a ghost, drafting behind me It’s hard now, but it could be harder You can go – you’re free But my body’s so big, it rests like a bolder So when I’m asleep, use love like a lever and roll me down Send me back to the other town and clear the path for thee You could go anywhere or you could run this town Get all the thieves to share Are you happy now? All over the world, people are struggling for and with things they don’t control, and can’t control What’s the goal? I will stay here, in isolation I’ll struggle against my own sense of frustration with my back on the land Is that something you understand? Is this what you planned? You could go anywhere You could be president Get all the fools to bow Are you happy now? All this and more could be yours So take it if you want to Take it if you want to Want to?
5.
LONELY DAUGHTER Cry, lonely daughter, while your mother’s away, far away Baby remembers bein held, bein held every day Mama singin, “Baby mine, don’t you cry” Mama singin, “Baby mine, don’t you cry” Grown girl is gone to find a baby, stop the lonely, make her smile She has lots of money so the baby will be healthy It won’t cry Sigh, jilted daughter, you were the pride in your day, back in the day Pleasing the mother with your sweet, with your sweet, sassy ways Who will wash your hair and who will dry it? Who picked out that ugly dress that you have on? You’ll be a mess, I guess, until you find that loneliness like a kernel in your sneaker Pry it out Mama, let the baby cry It won’t die Mama, let the baby cry, It won’t die A good girl cuts the strings and goes away and brings the baby by and by
6.
Work It Out 02:50
WORK IT OUT If it is not knocking, do not let it out If it is not crying, do not try to work things out If it is not pretty, then do not make out If what’s burning is not yours then do not put the fire out If you cannot see it, do not seek it out If you cannot bear to listen, do not hear it out If your house is good enough, why venture out? If your room has what you need, why bother going out? Because why go out? Stay in when the world is full of men And so why go out at all when like none of them will call? So just stay home in your bed and just hide your head instead because without them you’re no good to anyone Let it out It’ll sicken if it stays Let it out You know we will feel much better this way Work it out if we have to talk all night Say what’s wrong but make sure to say what is right
7.
FLOTSAM IN THE WAKE Micah, your pens are like lenses Natalja, your hands are like birds Justin, your songs are like drowning then breathing, like speech before words I could be in a primordial sea growing legs where my fins used to be, with you the brew that my new cells use like glue We all need a bigger hand to hold onto We see the transparent vision We feel the transparent form We breathe before our mouths open We spoke before we were born Because we were there when the first big hole did tear, points ascribed to what once was nowhere So we will make, we will mend more than we break, because we remember being flotsam in the wake
8.
Baby Monitor 03:05
BABY MONITOR Check it once and check it twice: the baby monitor of the world is alight But this baby never is sleeping It’s crying and screaming and then it seems to stop breathing so go up and check it again! But there’s no life in your device It looks at you with a dead stare Don’t ask it how it is doing It only does things the one way It can’t make a choice and it cannot ever change O! my dreams can’t follow me to bed I lose them on the way when I outrun them O! my eyes can’t focus on your face, your features all replaced by a likeness Constant contact is a vice when just a tender touch on my hand would suffice I don’t have to know where you’re going You don’t have to call when you’re there As long as you’re home before morning, babe, I don’t care
9.
SWALLOW THE PILL Would you swallow that pill? Because I will, I will Could you hang on to that hand? Because I can, I can And could you stay here with me for a while, always knowing that it’s not our bodies’ style to live forever? Death to death and death to life, I’m here with you tonight Death to death and death to life With lightning in the sky Death to death and death to life I’m here with you tomorrow night To those who mock and scorn us, I’ll tell them what I know, and this is what I know: that someday our love will die just like everything dies Everything dies But it’s not just you and me, I’m married to the mystery and I love it, too just like I love you
10.
INFINITY SONG When will it end? Will it end? Will it? The only sky that I can see is spinning to infinity through windows wide But here inside my darkened room, with solid walls and solid roof, I’m finite Will you be the one to pull me through? Savior's Son, like all the ones before you? And when we’re free, where will we flee to make the sleeping something set inside us wake? Because, darling dear, if you are there, the ribs around my heart will still a prison make There is one thing I have yet to try Jailer, turn the key and bleed me dry Incapacitate me, free my mind and the rest will follow then leave without a trace so that I can forget I didn’t do it on my own

credits

released June 3, 2016

// Recorded in spring and summer of 2015 at Russian Recording, Bloomington, Indiana
// Written by Erin Tobey
// Performed by Erin Tobey (guitar, bass, organ, recorder), Matt Tobey (bass, guitar, synth, organ, percussion, background vocals), and Jeff Grant (drums, percussion, background vocals)
// Engineered, mixed, and mastered by Mike Bridavsky
// Assistant Engineering by Kyle Houpt
// Additional vocals on ALL OVER THE WORLD by Kate Duneman and Jonathan Cargill
// Additional guitar on INFINITY SONG by Mike B.
// Front cover: ICON PAINTING by John Berry (Oil on canvas, 84x84”, 2012, johngberry.com)

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Erin Tobey Bloomington, Indiana

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MIDDLEMAZE, out now from Let's Pretend Records.

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Cover/background art by John Berry

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